smell my finger.
Wow, you know I need to stop drinking alone when I pour my drink into my hand and offer it to my dog,
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
I am a mess. Weirdest thing: I woke up with a hammer under my pillow. No idea why.
Riding on an electric horse at the grocery store... dunno how that conversation went but I hope you picked up a 12 pack.
Stumbled into class and into a desk. When I fell my bottle broke in my backpack. I had to leave there was vodka everywhere.
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
Ok. Here's the plan. Take your hand (whichever is closest), summon all your nerve, and just stick it right down his pants.
I love you.
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
Are you vicariously golddigging through me?!
Found out the cop gives spectacular head. Don't ask. We're going out to dinner Saturday.
so apparently over the course of the night my roommate and i had sex in exactly the same spot. ps the downstairs sink needs cleaning.
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
Randomize
