Sorry I thought I was a lizard earlier.
so i had a choice between studying for my physics test on fluid dynamics or spend the night with my girlfriend. hello doubletasking.
Yes, you did come over last night. You also tried to give my dog a blowjob. You got rejected.
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
There's a paramedic out here, what have you done?
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
Dude.. You paid a stripper $50 to listen to you cry last night.
I woke him up this morning and said I have a meeting w my advisor in an hour you need to wake up, cum on my face, and take me to my car.
It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
Her idea of a bathing suit is... well.. she might not actually even know what one is. I've only ever seen her in a pool drunk and fully clothed or attempting to get into a pool but tripping over her pants which are at her ankles. Drunk.
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
Do they mail horrible human being awards or do I have to pick it up or what's the protocol on that shit
think before you get married my friend it's my birthday and just got done jacking off
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
Randomize
