And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
I'm playing with the baby I just found in your kitchen
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
Whoever put the picture of my dad in the condom box is an asshole
how many lesbians have to have their hearts broken before they realise I am not that kind of DJ
There was blow residue on my chem book and my TA was like, did u stain your notebook with CaCO3?
Balls deep in an Orange is the New Black marathon. Bring food and drugs.
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
that awkward moment when you use blowjob jokes as a segue into coming out as bi
Knew i was going to puke. So i grabed a bowl out of the kitcken in the dark before bed...Ended up puking into a spaghetti strainer...
I told you that you couldn’t eat fifty tacos, you slapped me in the face, ate seventeen tacos, and fell asleep on my floor
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