I was eating out this girl yesterday and when I finished, she asked me if I wanted to take any home with me. She was serious, dude!
What does that even mean?
i actually have a tan line from him holding my boob while we were sunbathing
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
Ohh man do you know how awkward it is to keep eye contact and have a normal conversation with someone while their hand is in your vagina?
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
you took a potato out of your pocket and just started eating it raw. don't know where the potato came from though
21st birthday = success
Next Halloween I want us to dress up as jockeys, get drunk, and ride a carousel all night until we throw up or declare a winner
Dude. There are selfies on my phone of me, wide-eyed, sucking my pillow. We did NOT split that bag 50/50.
my mom tried to talk to me about my drinking, i somehow turned it around on her, now shes going to AA and I'm going to the bar.
Please tell me I made it home with both shoes on
Nope
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
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