we have pet lesbian snakes
I was officially considered the drunkest person in cuba when the bartender at the swim up bar made me wear a life jacket for 'safety purposes'
You never did explain why you were in wal-mart with a wok full of popcorn.
he was holding the bottle like a running back yelling for security and the national guard as he was being tackled
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
The party got busted because you two got caught having sex on the neighbors trampoline, come on man.
The last thing I remember is feeding country fried steak to my best friend in a bubble bath with my bare hands.
My boss just told me not to come back to work if I decide to drink. Challenge accepted.
Dude, we apparently put a washing machine drum in that back of your truck with the full intention of making a bonfire in it.
It looks like I murdered a care bear and put its blood in my hair to warn the others off.
Look, sometimes you have to snapchat a topless photo of yourself in the middle of class just to prove you can. I can and I did. End of argument.
The paramedics said she just kept whispering "I just wanted to party"
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
It really hurts to walk. Any idea what happened to my hip?
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