i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
Why do I feel like that's not the first time you've drank champagne with someone dressed as a unicorn?
I hope my sperm were as drunk as I was.
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
I know. They started calling me The Incident. The hotel maids, that is.
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
Well I found my neighbors on tinder if you're wondering how my night went
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
2016 is coming through for me, I'm renaming it the year of great dick
You ran full speed into the glass door with your Patron and yelled "FEEL THE RHYTHM, FEEL THE RHYME"
Sooo...you're driving 6 hours for free booze?
Don't judge me.
Holy. Shit. I just remembered all the lapdances....
Randomize
