I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
OK, the bar's closing. Do I go to home to my wife or my girlfriend?
I have no idea what happened after 2 AM. I woke up on my bike, in my bed, with a deep thigh bruise.
He would stand there for a few seconds with a blank look on his face then randomly start running full sprint towards macdonalds. We'd catch him and he'd promise to stop so we'd let him go and he'd do it again.
She sent me a pic of shot glasses on fire if that tells you anything
No no no no no no.... That's my emergency bottle for when I realize I've hit rock bottom
I think my hookup is starting to fall for me. Time to break his heart.
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
cool, get new shit, I dnt want the same old if it's my last drink ever
The world isn't ending you idiot. I'll grab beer
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
Naw man, if he's crazy enough to jerk off on a public bus he's too crazy for me to fuck with
We're currently sharing pics of our cats. I can't wait to sit on her face.
We can use the Mac n cheese as the potatoes in our breakfast burritos. Problem solved.
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
Randomize
