He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
I can't be drunk. Sober yes. Drunk no. Spoonfuls
vaguely remember the bartender stopping me outside last night so he could pull the duct tape out of my hair
You'd be proud of me. They tried to give me bread to sober up, but I told them no, im on a diet.
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
You definitely in your drunken state were really concerned you would forget to buy milk today
You know it's been a successful day when the only reason you put on a bra was to take off your shirt
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
Just checking to make sure you weren't kidnapped, pregnant or watching Fox News.
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
All i remember is looking at the bottle vodka that I was drinking and wondering how it was suddenly empty.
That may have had to do with you chugging it
Congratulations on giving me my first and second hickeys last night. I made it almost 30 years without one, but who needs class these days?
Randomize
