How drunk are you??
I'm flawless.
I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
I'm so over stopping myself from talking about my sexual experiences in front of children.
I can't go out tonight I need to save my money for important things.....like rogaine and ecstasy.
being a part time student has turned me into a full time alcoholic.
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
Just text the random number in my iphone notes that was entered at 1am. Should be interesting.
The only difference between us and a pack of 14 year old girls is substance abuse
Trying to Jedi mind trick myself into not throwing up. This is not the esophagus you are looking for.
You hit your head and proceeded to fall in the floor, curl up in my lap and make me rock you like a small infant. I was beginning to worry until you started to sing "Rock me momma like a wagon wheel".
Randomize
