I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
in the event that i am dead, my body is laying in the intersection of ... the pearl in springfield. it was my friend's 21st but i think i'm dead. wearing a black top. like i said, probably dead.
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
They found an open window, climbed through and proceeded to arrest half the party. These campus cops are like fucking ninjas.
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
I feel like I need to get a restraining order against him but I'd probably be the one to break it.
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
I don't know how or when he is sober long enough to donate plasma
My mom just gave me my fake back to buy her more wine.
If you need us, Zoe and I will be on my kitchen floor drinking Gatorade and crying
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
I'm twenty nine years old, now is not the time to start trying new drugs. I need a hedge fund...not another drug-induced hangover.
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
Man, I'm never going tanning again he noticed the burns on my ass
Randomize
