Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
oh my god i just remembered the cat blow jobs.
Now have a vodka water and get your shit together
He kept pouting and saying i cockblocked him and I kept yelling "I'm sorry...but the cock was never out to be blocked"
Being invited to eat tater tots at 1:30am by a rly hot girl then actually only eating tater tots is a major let down. Tasty, but still a let down
She's dipping the chocolate graham crackers in marshmallow vodka for a 'campfire taste'
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
Of course not. I'd be offended if you didn't bring my boobs into casual conversation.
I just realized that at some point last night I told someone I would only be friends with 16% of them because the other 84% stole my people's land
Letting Freddy Krueger eat me out = HAPPY HALLOWEEN TO ME!!!
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
Accidentally made a bowl of macaroni and cheese with a bottle of vodka. It's not that bad
1 why did you tell them where i peed last night and 2 where the fuck are you
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