Oh shit. I just had to lure him into the bedroom so I could take the list of his negative qualities off the fridge so he wouldn't see.
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
I don't care if I just threw up. You kiss me now. This is marriage.
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
This is the only time in your life where finding a half eaten lime and pair of florescent pink underwear that wasn't yours means that it was a good night
Dude that soap I drank last night is fucking killing me.
Nope, can't do it. It's a snowball effect. Today, leggings as pants. Tomorrow, female hitler. Natural progression.
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
Why were you twerking to, "The Wheels on the Bus"?
My sex life is driven by spite and alcohol
I woke up this morning and had to retrieve my clothes from the flagpole, they were using my boxers as a makeshift rally flag for drinking. Yeah last night was a success.
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
He's smoked my weed, stolen my cigarettes, and used my campus cash, but I try to initiate sex and NOWWW he's all "As your RA, that's a line I can't cross"
Randomize
