I just bought Christian paraphenilia at Borders for my dad's bday. I had the urge to tell them it wasn't mine, like I was buying laxatives or a dildo
Hahahaha. You probably would have been more comfortable buying either of those than what you just bought
she said if she won the lottery she'd fuck me... isn't that like government funded prostitution?
I just spent 30 minutes cleaning out my coleman grill. Did you really have to have grilled yogurt?
I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
I thought he was walking around the front. I just hit and run my booty call. I'm the worst non girlfriend ever
Seriously how many times do I have to sleep with him before he stops calling me dude
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
He accidentally opened the car door during sex and all the lights came on. Needless to say, that kid passing by who was walking his dog got scarred for life.
I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
YOU WILL GIVE ME MASHED POTATOES OR I WILL RIP YOUR SOUL INTO 7 PIECES AND YOU WILL TURN INTO LORD VOLDEMORT
Put on your bikini and meet me at the pool \nit’s cock o’clock!
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