so the situation is a+b=c where "a" is how much you weight, "b" is my gravitational pull, and "c" is how erect your penis is.
her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
TAKE DOWN THAT PHOTO OF ME IN THE NURSES COSTUME NOW.
Dude their dog does tricks for sips of beer. He keeps going up next to people and trying to shake. This is awesome.
I opened up my wallet and it was filled with puke.
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
I hate him. I fucked every one of his friends AND his fat brother and he still won't break up with me.
Hey texans ride hard. He should have known what he was in for when I asked to sit on his face. The broken nose was a BADGE he just earned.
You know I'm dangerous when I have make-out withdrawals
Do you think the firemen will remember me?
Yes. But you were sloppy, sobbing, and puked on two of them. You won't get in their pants.
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
I'm pretty sure I went in the girls bathroom and vomited everywhere then looked for a urinal for like 20 minutes
I don't care how many things you caught on fire, it's still not as bad as doing coke and then filming yourself having sex.
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
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