I have to start avoiding pregnant women. This is getting out of hand.
Apparently throwing up on your own cape is still a party foul
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
I was blowdrying my hair this morning and I swear to god it smelled like franzia
I'll throw in a blow job for your kind ways. Or another booty call. I'm poor and not very imaginative. This is all I have to offer- the unicorn like wonders of my vagina.
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
When you wake up so hungover that you don't even wanna cough for fear of vomiting... It's not gunna be a good day.
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
Ate his Chinese food and drank his beer and played with his chihuahua. All while wrapped in a towel while he was sleep.
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
Go ahead without me. This chick is buying me drinks and just found out her husband is cheating on her. I think I just found the next level of revenge fucking: Scorned Trophy Wife Sex
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