She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
At a stoplight watching a woman push groceries in a stroller while dodging oncoming traffic... Reallllly Detroit?
So guy #2, the dancer, is programmed into my phone under the name H.uy. His number- 11 digits. I should have stopped drinking.
My body has become completely dependent on Text Twist. I can't poop without it.
I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
It's like the last supper of drinking before the summer ends
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
You walked up to me, grabbed my face and said "I just peed in the sink!"
Don't worry you weren't as drunk as you thought. You only fell 4 times.
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.
Well I'm sorry I assumed you were a human and that humans have the capability to forget sometimes.
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
Randomize
