ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
FYI... At my funeral, it will be your job to throw yourself dramatically onto my casket.
I'm gonna have bed sores at the end of this hangover.
I gave up sex for lent.
I guess that means I'm postponing our date until after Easter.
She's singing So Happy Together to her burrito, I want to be on her level.
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
Learned a valuable life lesson last night. It's titled "Tequila: Still A Bad Idea".
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
WHY ARE YOU SMOKING WEED WHEN YOU JUST HAD A STROKE. AND MORE IMPORTANTLY WHY ARE YOU DOING IT WITHOUT ME.
Please don't smoke the bong in the bathroom while you shit. It is not a shitting bong.
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
I flashed my boobs, shit my pants, and kissed the wrong twin. I'm on a roll you don't want in on.
Randomize
