Midget sex pt 2 tonight
he is naked. in. my. bed. happiest day. of my. LIFE.
Did u pay ur friends to not make fun of me?
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
I had sex with her because I didn't want to hurt her feelings.. You're the one who told me I should be more sensitive.
I feel like i got beat with a pillowcase full of tequila shots.
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
Your texting shows a blood alcohol level of .12
dude you said you were going to be a human flag and climbed the telephone pole and fell in front of a car
Just got a handjob from a 19 year old in front of the Parthenon. The Greek god of debauchery would be proud.
Have you ever come so hard that right after you have the urge to yell "make me a sandwich!"? ...I think my ovaries turned into testicles.
He sent me a snap of him eating a tamale shirtless. I think I might be in love.
LOCK HIM DOWN.
I just woke up with a pair of handcuffs in my pants, can u explain this?
Randomize