matt is drinking blue powerade and it looks like he has hypothermia. i can't take this kid anywhere.
FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
how the fuck did you end up in georgia? you were here at my party dry humping some chick 2 hours ago
so you mean to tell me that there is no way you can get me?
dude we gotta go shopping. I made pancakes this afternoon and used them as sandwich bread.
last time i saw her she was begging the broken jukebox to play lady gaga.
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
No, she passed out instead. I have the worst luck, its like Jesus is mad at me for having the same birthday as him
We just shotgunned beers for America
He thought he was drowning because he was drinking water and intentionally holding his breath. Dear god what did you get me in to.
Oh and now he's calling me Brohammed Ali.
All I saw was a purple blob and poking out from under was part of a green shirt. Took me a minute to realize it was him under that beast.Thought I should ask if he was actually breathing and conscience but then I saw him slowly exploring what few brave men have done before.
You know it's a good weekend when you wake up on Sunday questioning your sexuality.
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
Did you cry?
I don't think so. I definitely lost my cool though
Yeah i think jesus would lose his cool in that situation
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
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