i was just at lovers lane looking for gifts for a bachelorette party.....with my mom
Don't interrupt me, I have a limited time to be high and thus be remarkably good at Pac Man
cutting back on calories before spring break by only taking shots instead of drinking actual drinks.
the diet of an alcoholic...
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
i'm having flashbacks of crying and telling you i was made out of egg salad.
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
I just really need a hug and a shower beer
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
the dj asked me quote "are you sure you're sober enough to do this?" And I grabbed the mic from him and said "ill fucking show you sober- HIT IT". I also dropped the mic at the end so he had to come around and pick it up
Shania Twain would have been proud
He didn't get how "starting a flash flood in my thunderhole" was a sexy euphemism. Deal breaker.
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
drunk boyfriend and drunk me are NOT meant for each other
Randomize
