Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
Just transferred the sun chips from that obnoxious Eco-friendly bag into a zip lock. Fuck the environment, that bag is loud.
I have teeth marks. Like distinct upper and lower jaw.
Yeah me too. My shoulder looks rabid.
Your philanthropic work just got me laid, thanks dad for naming me #2.
Ok, gonna go sleep cuz my brain wants to be smart and not follow my pussy into the danger zone
Bonus points if someone shits their pants. Only 1/2 bonus points if it's you
Bonus points are bonus points regardless
I'm currently braless eating the balls of the penis cake and drinking warm champagne. I'm 3 cats away from crazy at this point
Today is going to be the longest game of "was that a fart, or do I need to go wipe?" I have ever played. Maybe the most challenging too.
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
Do you hit a new low in life when you have to carry around a puke bag in your purse when you're hungover?
If you had a dick, I would hope it falls off and comes back to haunt you while fucking your ears at night. But you don't. But if you did, that's how mad I am at you
Sorry about the nipples in that snapchat. It was meant for the Australian.
he's a mother fucking interior design major!! we boned and fell asleep and now we're laying in bed discussing what color i should paint my room. i'm marrying him
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
So you just held his hand and he fucking came...?
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