people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
Why can't I find a man that likes bush instead of a vagina that looks like it belongs to a prepubescent child!
Because men are children
Touche
Someone told me that drinking would get me no where in life. Drinking has gotten me everywhere in life.
woke up this morning with pubes superglued to my face, not my pubes
Is a Chipotle burrito an acceptable "sorry I ran over your cat" gift?
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
Chinatown. Her fortune cookie said "accept the next proposition you receive." TELL ME NO NOW.
She kept sniffing my sweater and tried to guess what type of detergent I use.
New rule: gentleman callers are required to bring me gifts of beer when coming over to court you. Tell the monster jam dudes so they know.
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
its like a catch 22, sucks that you've stopped, but its like a vagina high five
Because 9 pm Thursday you drink a loco cause you just wanna get drunk and have a good time with your friends. Then you wake up on Tuesday and you've had 17 locos and you're pregnant, lying on the side of the road, 3 states over. THAT'S why we don't have only locos parties.
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
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