You screamed, "I am going to fuck this cheeseburger". They all started laughing until you actually started having sex with the cheeseburger.
So what does a sober person do in Vegas on a Friday night?
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
I've crashed the car, it's a write off. The police are here and I'm dressesd as a crayon.
hotel security told us you walked into the hotel with blood all over your dress, weren't wearing any underwear and were escorted back by three men who were believed to be "homosexuals".
I dont know if you relize this but ive been high ly medicated in my room for a whil now. GOing out into the real world would make me li ke tom ha nks. im not ready to be tom hanks..
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
Occasionally I curse my inner 15 year old when I'm fulfilling their dreams as a slut, but I roll with it.
This coke is making my nose hairs dance. That good.
This bitch rocks a fuckin fanny pack and still manages to lose her phone at every thirsty thursday
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
And thanks for putting me in that safety position on the bathroom floor while I was spooning the toilet
she grabed my junk and started making lightsaber noises
I wonder if you could get her in a metal bikini
Omg I just looked in my purse from last night.. 10 bags of gummy bears.
Randomize
