First, he can't make me cum.. And now, he can't get it up because he LOVES me?!!??! i don't think so.
I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
so i decided not to tell her that her fiance is cheating since i already bought the bridesmaid dess
Whats the glycemic index on semen?
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
I WILL NOURISH YOU WITH SOUP AND PENIS!!!!!! And a sandwich of your choosing.......you like turkey?
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
I have what looks like a rubber stamp mark on my cock from last night that says "Magic Marla Approved" Do we know a Marla?
Don't do shots out of Tostitos scoops.
My mom has a bong in her bathroom, but no air freshener.
They think I'm one of them. I'm about to get drunk in a Santa suit and bust down the door singing Christmas carols.
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
Randomize
