just had dinner with my dad's new gf and her daughter.. had to drink a beer to get through it.. she's 19 she has on a disney watch and snowflake earrings
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
I am going to wait until he wakes up to set his couch on fire and then pee it out. That way he knows it was not an accident.
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
This bitch rocks a fuckin fanny pack and still manages to lose her phone at every thirsty thursday
I don't care how sexy you think I look in my scrubs. Wanting a blow job is not a medical emergency.
I woke up naked under desk at her apt once during my freshman year. I should have known that friendship was of a different breed...
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
cops woke me up on the sidewalk and asked where my shoes are.. fuck if i know, im sleeping on the sidewalk! actually i didnt say that, i just cried until they gave me a ride home.
A big thanks to that bride-to-be, Her fiance and his loaded friends will forever hold a place in my heart for the generous tequila body shots on the couch at Henry's.
I think I may have gotten way too used to using my boobs as an extra hand/pocket...almost stabbed myself in the chin bc I forgot I put my fork there
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
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