Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
i've got to stop sleeping with short guys. they always turn into stage 5 clingers
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
She has an emergency bra in her purse. I'm gonna check no on the 'introducing her to my new boyfriend' box.
I fake pass out to avoid hookups sometimes. Last night I fake slept on my bathroom floor for like 2 hours before the guy left.
I just crawled out of bed at 5AM to make her a peanut butter and Nutella sandwich. Somewhere in the distance, I could hear whips cracking.
Your boyfriend and I are bonding over your giant dick.
I could run a drunk marathon in heels
I know but at least you've never been asked to have sex dressed up like Catwoman
I'm about to turn myself in when I'm less hungover.
It was a "have 911 on speed dial" kinda night
Just let me put on a bra and brush the alcohol out of my hair.
You were laying on the floor coloring a "get well soon' card for your liver...
My hook-up from last week somehow found me at the club, saw the girl I was trying to fuck, kissed me right in front of her, and walked off.
Randomize
