I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
he literally just asked me which v neck he should wear tomorrow.
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
I definitely recall eating shredded cheese out of the bag while you were wearing that apron.
I wasn't hungover this morning. My head just hurt because someone tried to suction cup a dildo to my forehead.
You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city.
Something's wrong. My throat is definitely not in it's normal spot. Way too low.
Your 13 year old niece and her best friend half carried you from the beach to the pool where you then clung onto a raft and screamed about having pretty hair.
yeah the little voice in my head screaming YOU NEED TO GET LAID eventually grew legs and started kicking me so to avoid brain damage i had to fuck him
He said the last thing he remembered thinking was: 'Why is this vagina spinning?' Too drunk sex is no ones friend.
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
When the stripper from this weekend is your cashier at Publix the next day 😐💀#pensacolaproblems
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
outside on the street drinkin, walked into a random house and asked to pee, some kid hands me a beer and says i have to chug it first
Randomize
