God I can't wait to have my phone textbombed every night
My eyes are so dilated i literally have night vision right now.
His dick looked like E.T.'s finger. It scared me.
I found her sleepin on the side of the house in the rocks. so i woke her up and yelled at her and she would only come inside if i let her sleep in the bathroom.
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
Front seat of an Escalade in a limo-service parking lot. That is all.
Date idea: we should go to the store and buy all the different kinds of Lay's and eat them all
I just paid for weed by taking him to the store to buy cheese so he could make empanadas. Best. Drug deal. Ever.
I just want to make out with him forever
Low key that was incredibly dangerous to let me wield a sword at this point in the night
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
She made me undress her with my teeth...explains the button in my shit this morning...
I went in the hotel's jacuzzi fully clothed, threw up in the bathroom half an hour later and woke up naked next to Dr. Seuss' "Oh the Places You'll Go"
What does it mean when the bartender gives you 4 straws?
the next morning his mother came in to tell me that she made breakfast. she told me to put my clothes on too. awkward.
Randomize
