Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
He asked what my name was on facebook chat. IT SAYS RIGHT THERE. i will never be drunk enough for this guy.
Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
And then we made magical love in his room under a blacklight as his roommate and girlfriend argued violently in the living room
A girl just asked me if we had pregnancy tests and a coworker had to stop me from telling her I was a pregnancy test. THAT is why I don't drink at work.
The funny part was that the cop pulled us over cause the park was closed, not because I had just come up from giving the guy a blowjob when the cop drove by.
I am a good friend because I got you a bagel. I am a bad friend because I ate half of it.
You must take up my position now. You must pass out in awkward places as I taught you... Sears a hotel elevator and Burger King bathroom. You potential for greater young grasshopper.
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
We might as well just set our livers out to sea on burning ships
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
Fuck it, I work hard. I deserve nice sex toys
jump out the window naked night went bad
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