So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
making cat noises will not fix the situation.
Found out in my property law class that you can sell your eggs for $8000. Helloooo spring break.
it's pretty bad when you go in bed bath and beyond and recognize 6 different bed spreads you've had sex on
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
Yea, remember to blow out the fire from flaming shots. Unless you want burnt lips. Just saying, I'm an example of ignorance and intoxication.
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
I woke up to his gay cousin telling me I had the prettiest boobs. I don't even wanna know.
On a side note...my DUI lawyer just snapchatted me. This is the exact moment in time when I realized my like IS a joke.
One of the annoying girls in my 7 AM class showed up drunk for her 21st birthday and just auctioned off her fake ID.
Just had a serious discussion with my ex-boyfriend about sexy nurse vs. sexy teacher. So score one for friendship I guess.
I just had to kick out lesbian wedding crashers. They literally wanted to punch me. I threatened to call the cops so they went outside and smoked a joint.
Wait, but now I'm curious. In what position were y'all when the cops came? Were you guys butt ass naked in the car? 😂😂
I haven’t sent any nudes yet in 2018.
That’s not true...is it?
can you bring the lube to algebra tomorrow
Randomize
