I figured it out. hungover me hates drunk me, drunk me hates sober me, and sober me hates being sober. so yes, were blacking out tonight.
Need a travel agent to tell me which countries in Asia have legalized prostitution for New Year. Fireworks would be cool too.
By this time tomorrow I expect us to be sitting at the kitchen table either playing a drinking game, or crying. Set an alarm
My dads not up on pop culture but he's not dumb enough to believe your 2 girls 1 cup reference at dinner was from the bible.
Well, for starters, she called the condom a "dick mask."
I am stoned and listening to the Olympics music I downloaded on Saturday. Best 6 dollars I have ever spent.
He was running late for work this morning, so I helped him out by finding a matching pair of black socks. And I hated it. So I'm currently drinking and reminding myself of the reasons I will never get married.
Does it qualify as sexting if you're both pretending to be fictional characters?
I'm not sure whether to be proud of you or weirded out.
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
She pulled me up to my feet by my hair. I thought it was you for a second. My drunken angel savior.
Watching the Walking Dead, snuggled up naked, and drinking a beer. No better way.
If ever there was a tweet to describe your life, it's this.
I think it was a low point but honestly at this point I've had so many that my life is like a valley
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
Randomize
