dude facebook disabled my account because im registered under a false identity. now in order to get it back, i have to prove that it's really my name. i sent them an email and had to sign it "Cordially, Lloyd Pancakes"
question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
tequila makes her clothes fall off
wow Mom, sounds like youre having a good time
Also I just saw on facebook your sister is taking pole dancing lessons. Just a heads up.
I just got home. Seriously all I remember is taking out my contacts and putting your balls in my mouth.
You tried to sled down the middle of the street. In. Your. Coat. Of course you are bruised.
You were laying in bed whispering and crying to the half eaten burrito saying "why am I shitting so much" and "what did I do to deserve this"
i've been hiding in the laundry chute for like thirty minutes from her. not my manliest moment. but dude this is awesome
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
I think I've been inadvertently participating in a contest to see how many times I can show up to work hungover in my first year of teaching. And I'm the only participant. Not sure if I'm winning or losing.
He went in for a kiss so I shook his hand instead.
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
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