I found my crush's facebook page. And his wife's. Apparently they are still in love. Of all the people to have happy marriages! Fuck, I'm depressed.
One of my residents in my hall just found my positive pregnancy test from last year I hid behind the fridge, I'm just going to tell them it was for a science project.
So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
youre totally missing out on eating your boogers right now. my entire face is numb
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
i just discovered a movie that charlize theron is a sex addict. i think my prayers have been answered
The bartender cut me off so I peed in the corner. How no one noticed I have no idea.
I'm starting to think you fell asleep on your kitchen floor pantless with salsa spilt around you
okay the fridge is completely filled only with alcohol. Not even exaggerating. There is no food.
Sometimes I wonder if we're going to make it to 40.
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
Any residual attraction has just been ruthlessly murdered by that mustache.
Love these next 4 months. Wake up from a college football hangover and get to put your hand down your pants and watch NFL football all day.
I'm so happy we share a mutual love of laughing at religion.
You wouldnt listen to us when we told you there was no place that was selling girlscout cookies at 4:30am...
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