ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
I cleared a drunken path to my bed for you. If you hit clothes you've gone too far.
I action rolled over a firepit. Twice. I am the action roll king
I paused mid sex to tell him I wished I'd taken up barrel racing so I could ride better.
You insisted on going outside so you could "breathe real air".
We lost a condom inside me, I had to fish it out. The next day he gave me a Gone Fishin' bumper sticker. True love at its finest.
She's riding a bike down the street and drinking brown liquor. A pt cruiser is honking at her and she's like I HEAR YOU!!
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
I'm truly not mad that he's at a strip club, it's that he couldn't look far enough into the future to figure out how to get himself home from one
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
So is it safe to say that my only objective from last night is to finish this entire jar of peanut butter?
What're you gonna do with the rest of your night?
Probably watching cooking videos and fantasizing about pie
The body is still out there. I don't think my trainer realized when he asked me not to drink for 24 days, how often I see dead people
Just whisper "I fucked your boyfriend" in her ear and be done with it.
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
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