Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
I need to stop coming to work sober
I think a girl in front of me glued an ugg tag to a weird pair of boots.
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
It was 5 a.m. and we found him making margaritas with nyquil...
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
I told the girl in his bed not to bleed on his sheets like the last one.
I haven't been this hungover since you found me laying in front of your door gagging with pepto bismal tablets scattered around me
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
I refuse to have sex with you and your eBay condoms.
I'm getting shit face wasted, and I have to be up so early tomorrow. I am bad at smart.
Realizing life ain't all about burritos and strippers, it's a struggle out there, and it ain't looking pretty so far,..
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
Randomize