my computer doesn't work...
why?
i puked on it last night
I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
Word to the wise: do not smoke before going grocery shopping with only 12 bucks. So stressful.
Why the FUCK can i grow hair on my big toes but not on my chest?
My spanish isn't great but I'm pretty sure he was calling me a "little monkey" while I was blowing him
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
Getting high magically turns headaches into rainbows.
You bought champagne and told everyone it was because I'd just found out I was pregnant. How exactly is that being a good wingman?
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
I totally left my shirt at your house. Also I think I high fived your cactus last night�
I made him dress me after we fucked. He put me in TMNT pants and then told me I looked hot.
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
sometimes you just have to listen to beyonce and cry. that's how life works
there were rolls with just one bite out of each one leading to the bedroom. you were laying on the bed naked and yelled 'you did it you followed the bread crumbs!'
Let's do something tonight. I feel like setting things on fire.
Randomize
