You screamed 'pound me, you big thick stud.' I looked around for porn cameras.
Shut up. I did not.
I really wish I was making that up.
you were so high you spent the rest of the night smelling pepper to prove you can sneeze with your eyes open
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
Had a dream I was a monkey and smoked pot out of a bong made out of a tree
I can hear my liver begging me not to go out tonight
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
We came back and there was a shotglass filled with what looks like blood. Come over soon, we're gonna try it out.
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
Discovered that a nalgene holds an entire bottle of wine. Going mobile. Come find me.
Just had an epiphany about how to drink more effectively in the shower. While walking across campus carrying a Franzia bag like Santa
I've decided that I'm okay with you getting a goat. I have to get over my completely rational fear of goats somehow.
My neighbor came out@4am in a pink nite gown n clotheslined a punk on a mo-ped w/her mop handle, then just walked back in her house like she just checked the mail. MILF 1 PUNK 0
i just want to get drunk and cry and have sex with lots of men
I have 4 more smokes and 6 more beers to go before I make a life changing decision like that.
New strategy for telling if someone is drunk: will they attempt to drink a candle if you put a straw in it?
Randomize
