I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
i remember introducing him to all my posters and making him be extra nice to frank sinatra and bob dylan before he fucked me
I can't wait to find out the true size of his penis! Please maintain enough sobriety for an accurate report.
I woke up with like grass burns all over my body, i'm pretty sure i made out with someone under a bus. . . but i'm not sure
That's your penis' name. I've always referred to it as Alejandro secretly.
Announcement: Given the sad circumstances regarding the death of my dearest friend Chong the Bong, there will be a brief memorial service for him tomorrow evening at 10:30 at my place. After sharing some memories and sending his spirit off to the great bowl in the sky, we will all take place in the commemoration and maiden voyage of his son, Chong Squared, who eagerly waits to meet all of you. High blessings to you all, piece be with you.
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.
Are you kidding me????? How bout, IM SORRY FOR CALLING YOU 16 TIMES AND LEAVING YOU A TWO MINUTE VOICEMAIL OF MYSELF THROWING UP.
Chang gave me a 1.5 gallon beer tasting cup, i have a new boyfriend with a huge stick, Members of the Irish Rugby team slapped my ass and cheered for firmness, and a couple of strangers are naming the child after me. Best. Weekend.Ever.
I'll have you know my trust issues and my daddy issues are two COMPLETELY different topics of conversation.
You know you're hung over when the glare from the cream cheese on your bagel is just too bright...
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
If waffles and beer don't scream "fuck me!" then I don't know what else to do.
Well, for starters, you were growling and slurping beer from a puddle on the carpet. Let's all hope that was beer...
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