in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
where am i from again
So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
I bought the love spell lotion from victoria secret so it atleast smells like a girl is present while I'm masturbating
I wish you had a penis so you could experience peeing out the window in front of a crowd of people leaving parties.
Apparently I walked up to him, mumbled something incoherently, then started to make out with him. Why does this always happen.
She called all of my friends to find out where I was last night. 7 out of ten said their place.
I just remembered that I did shots out of a gay mans crotch. And there's someone saved in my phone as "Miranda knows where my car is"
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
Quick!! What's a good reason for me to have rug burn on my chin?
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
Tinder in Coventry is like browsing a gallery of mugshots from Azkaban
I made a booty call at 3:30 am on a Monday... I think I just became the ultimate female fuckboy. I don't know whether to be ashamed or get myself a trophy.
Randomize