it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
Mother nature decided I wasn't going to be a whore today. Fuck her.
i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
remember the used condom we threw behind my bed? my mom found it and is accusing me and making a big deal out of it,
Haha! You pissed me off, so I actually told her to go look behind your bed. Good thing I moved to Nevada, so your dad can't kick my ass. Good luck bitch.
He tried to make eye contact, he should know by now that freaks me out
We got a Christmas tree, decorated it to surprise his wife And kids who were out of town for her father's funeral, then fucked like rabbits on their new mattress before he had to pick them up at the airport.
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
You must be buzzed on Miller Lite.. Zen master advice is flowing
hooked up with someone last night while wearing walrus pajama pants. clearly I'm accomplishing big things in life
I'm still mad from all the stupid shit he's done this week that even though I couldn't give two shits about Vday, I'm gonna throw an epic tantrum if he doesn't morph in to Nickolas Sparks for a day
highlight of my day: hitchhiking a ride with random locals. tried to make conversation, asked what they do. driver says "you clearly don't recognize me." turns out i have had sex with him and forgot.
You are officially qualified to graduate from college.
Yeah well I fucked my ex on a sink last night soooo booty calls for us all
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