Why are you such a perv today?
This is a lot to handle
Oh shh
I'm kidding you prude take a joke
I'm sorry I'm just not ready to become vampire yet
But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
If Billy Mays did an infomercial on your dick, it still wouldn't get you laid.
My parents showed me my IQ test from fourth grade, I'm shitting on my potential.
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
I guess the cop knew i was on a walk of shame and felt bad...i got to play with the siren the rest of the way home
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
The other night after we fucked we talked about Lowe's vision insurance. Never fuck a coworker.
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
And now for everyone's least favorite sport... Drunk babysitting.
I have got to stop letting people hang ornaments from my nipple ring.
Tis the season.
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
Some girls wake up to good morning texts. I wake up to pictures of an angry Shrek getting a blowjob.
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
Randomize
