All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
She carries a brick in her purse. I wouldn't get in a fight with her
Holy walk of shame. Fuck someone's house. I walked past a family eating their free continental breakfast wearing yesterday's makeup
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
If you're staying here tonight, you need to promise me you won't make another bonfire in the lounge room. My girl is still pissed about that.
I'm going to start referring to my liver is Livy. I feel like if I give it an affectionate nickname it will hate me less. Livy isn't ready for syllabus week.
I think we all know your liver needs a man's name.
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
Highlight of the weekend: getting roundhouse kicked in the dick while switching from reverse cowgirl.
This is not a costume party, I'm just wearing fairy wings.
Of course you are.
I just saw my 7th grade teacher at the club. We had a pretty good talk over drinks. Turns out we both like dancing on tables.
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
Like I didn't gracefully walk into these feelings. No, I fucking stumbled and fell face fucking first.
the staff put glowsticks in the urinals of the porta-pottys last night and honestly drunk me has never been more grateful for anything in his life
I woke up spooning with two strangers on Saturday morning... I felt like a sexual sandwich
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