dude i'm inner monologue high
you threw up out the window, wiped your face with a twenty dollar bill, and threw that out the window too.
did we at least go back and get it?
how else do you think we got jack in the box...?
I told her the maid must have stolen all my condoms. She bought it
sometimes i wish i had boobs. not on me. just like in a drawer.
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
Oh fuck, I messaged a Jack Kerouac poem to a girl I'm trying to sleep with last night at 4am.
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
Let's put a bunch of beers in a backpack and shotgun them in a Red Lobster bathroom
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
Drunk. Come get me. Out front blue shirt.
Where are you? And you borrowed my shirt. I know what you're wearing. How wasted are you?
Hotel
WHICH HOTEL??
He expects a blow job at the movies but won’t pay for popcorn? Does he know it’s not 2017 anymore
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