Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
don't get me wrong, i love how you're fun and free spirited. but there are some situations...like shooting down a bottle of sambuca standing in the shallow end topless surrounded by my friends
Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
Walked into a liquor store bleeding. That kind of night.
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
i think they forgot i was still in the room... she grabbed his balls and said "i feel a fire coming on".
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
i'm face down in a ditch right now please help this is not a metaphor for my life this is real.
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
I could drive to your house and kick you in the nuts right now....and not even stop for a burrito
I just love that a strip club has taco Tuesday.
Taking dicks and breaking hearts, no better life
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
Fuck you. Fuck this party. I just wanted to be pretty with a cute little tiara and boys sucking my tits, now i have a hangman game drawn on my face and jello shots in my hair.
I wanted to give you a great birthday party. You know I did.
Randomize
