I had to puke in a pizza box on the drive home. People saw.
after last night, i judge her for not breaking up with me
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
I just had a brazillian performed by a hungarian named olga. Im pretty sure she was trying to rip out my soul. You owe me a million orgasms
Your message cut off at "shit on the floor". Your life is incredible.
I woke up half naked on the floor next to his bed, and his cat was staring at me like it had seen everything that i myself don't remember..
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
Yeah you'd pretty much be ruined if you broke up with a guy like that and then had to return to the dating pool
Walking into my bedroom & smelling stale sex & disappointment isn't how I envisioned being 39, in case you were wondering.
and then after the older sorority girl asked me his name she said "he gave me the rest of his mcdonalds and I decided to go home with him. it was the best that I could hope for my night"
Noooo no no no no. She scares me. She means business. She wore a diaper when we went to the bar.
She made me watch three musicals and then told me she was too tired for me to stay over. I think I'm being punished but I have no clue what I did.
Randomize