summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
I put it into a sports analogy for him: there are three teams in the league- friends, fuck buddies, and dating, and the fuck buddies roster is full, pick an alternate team
he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
Ummmmm okay let's be incredibly straightforward. Hi there. My bed's at half capacity this evening. How'd you like to fill it up?
Holy walk of shame. Fuck someone's house. I walked past a family eating their free continental breakfast wearing yesterday's makeup
I drunkenly called my ex on Skype last night and didn't talk, just smiled real big at him until I fell asleep.
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
Fuck these runners passing me on campus as I'm waking to dinner. With my huggie. With flavored vodka and rum. Aka yum
I just had to kick out lesbian wedding crashers. They literally wanted to punch me. I threatened to call the cops so they went outside and smoked a joint.
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
True fear is being unable to remember where you hid your weed and vibrator in your parent's house.
Youre a wreck. Youll be in your dorm weeping to project runway covered in pizza sauce and smelling of stale beer
Randomize
