Whod you bang
I just got called an ass for saying no thanks to a Greenpeace solicitor. I don't want the whales to die but I do want Greenpeace to fail. Conundrum.
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
Apparently I kept telling the bartender that I was going to set the Guinness World Record.
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
you kept saying 'its nothing a six pack wont fix' as they loaded you into the ambulance.
In less than 3 minutes we had 3 security guards running after us
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
And that's the fourth pair of yoga pants with unwashable stains from you.
FYI your bra is now hanging in the hallway as a trophy.
New BDSM fun fact. When you get spanked hard enough with a flat object, you get welts. Welcome to thunderdome, bitches.
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
So today was the first day i've been sober since Wednesday according to my roommate!
OH GOD IT TASTES LIKE IT SMELLS
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