yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
I just found out my boyfriend is cheating on me, please tell me Carl is a unisex name.
as soon as his mom opened the door to let me in the house she asked if i would like a shot
it's gonna be a great weekend
I want to apologize in advance in the event I put my boobs in your face
I just sent a friend request to someone saying that i was the girl he shared a fifth of jager with last week. Thats something special. He better accept.
I fake pass out to avoid hookups sometimes. Last night I fake slept on my bathroom floor for like 2 hours before the guy left.
drunk her ninja stole one of the pizzas as it arrived and hid all of the pieces in a cereal box in the fridge.Genius.
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
A beer is a heart your wish makes!!!
I'm gonna let my dick speak for itself from now on. Seriously, it's always recruiting for me even after 6 hours of drinking.
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
Did I literally just offer a blowjob for help moving? Yes. Yes, I did.
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
On another note, I think my upstair neighbor is having sex. How awkward would it be if I showed up to her door with a bag of Chipotle?
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