How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
i dont think my parents would of encouraged me to save years of birthday money if they knew what i would eventually spend it on
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
I'm pretty sure whiskey overrules bulimia in the eyes of Texas boys
Less talking, more tequila
Someone woke me up and gave me a sprite and some pills. I put them in my belly button. Trust no one.
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
I have whiskey and jager. There's no telling what kind of monster will emerge
I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far..
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
"He didn't answer my snap so I know he's arrested"
Your mankini haunted my dreams.
If he gets me coffee, cold or no I'll make him see Jesus with my mouth.
Dude, you ever snap awake on the toilet at work with that panicked, "How long have I been here?!" feeling??
Your mom has reinvented the use of a ping pong ball.
Randomize
