She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
he called me "his little blueberry cunt muffin"...how would that make you feel?
every time I worry about a career mistake, I remember Michelle Pfeiffer did Grease 2.
i got pulled over in my 'cops love me' tshirt. he didn't think it was funny when i pointed it out.
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
He was having trouble staying hard then just stopped mid-sex and said "it's overheating" while pointing to his dick.
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
Man in California was arrested for killing and eating a wild bobcat while high on crystal meth. Let's please NEVER get that high on anything...
I went online and donated $30 to his walk-a-thon as a "sorry I puked in your bed last night"
I thought turtle was a code word for weed until he pulled out a baby turtle from his pocket and said "$20 for a turtle"
If man night ends at some point, hit me up and let me prove my vagina still exists.
You put your name in his phone but not your number then screamed "Open the door!" and jumped out of the car
Definitely accidentally brought drugs into Disneyland. Considering using them.
That was the best shit ever it was like an exorcism for my colon
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