**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
Flowers- 20. Dinner-50. Drinks- 25. Hotel- 150. The look on his face when I tell him I'm on my period? Priceless.
respond to me or i'm telling everyone that you inserted a vodka soaked tampon into your anus
i wanna make it FB official so he cant fuck anyone else. but that means i can't fuck anyone else either. CONUNDRUM
he just tried to lick my eyebrow. thats the deal breaker.
As I was leaving the drunk tank the cop told me he had a feeling we would be meeting again real soon.
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
I would rather deep fry my own cock while it's still attached to me than have his life.
I just need to repress my desire to share my impressive chugging abilities with the world and I won't black out so much
You know its been a rough night when for a large portion of the evening you have accepted your death
If that's all it takes to cure your hangovers then you need to drink more.
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
Who died my cat blue again?
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
Randomize
